Barlioche

Every place we'd been so far in Argentina was exhilarating with the kind of crisp beauty that makes you want to explore forever. By the third week and fourth city, I lost a little steam. Luckily Mark would have none of it and proceeded to drag us into the center of Bavarian style Barlioche on our first day. Forget modern hip playgrounds, we had a canon to play on. Forget hippie homestyle restaurants, we had breweries. Forget the emerald colored lake, we now had multiple glittering sapphire lakes. More fresh air, more adventure, more fun. 

Our family owned B&B was awesome: big breakfasts with fresh cake and fruit, a kitchen at our disposal, and fast internet. We could really relax, drink wine and binge watch Brooklyn 99 while the kids slept, and no one thought anything of it. If there's anyone out there who wants to stay on the east end of Barlioche, Kospi Guesthouse is a great option. 

Granted it took us a few tries to figure out transportation- the bus system works off a travel card (named the Sube) that can only be purchased and recharged at certain kiosks, many of which were closed or had disgruntled employees. After several attempts and two trips to the Visitor's Center, we charged our card (which was lent to us by the guesthouse) and boarded the stifling bus. Good news: one card can pay for everyone in your party. Annoying news: you are charged based on the number of kilometers you plan to travel, so you need to plan accordingly and know exactly where you want to get off. Otherwise the bus won't stop. This resulted in us backtracking along the narrow and dusty road more than once. 

Nevertheless we figured it out and did several trips out of the city. First stop was the Berlina, a brewery with a playground and real, grassy grass! This was the number one requested place to visit for our kids. On other days we went to Blest located next to Berlina, to Manush in the town center and to Lowther Brewery when were feeling sleepy and wanted to stick close to the guesthouse. The beers were tasty with a good variety: visit them all. 

On one particular bus trip that involved a crabby wife and two malingering kids who were frustrated with unavoidable backtracking, we ended up at the Cerro Campanario Chairlifts in efforts to make something of the day. For something like 120 pesos, a chairlift would bring us to the top for views of Nahuel Huapi National Park. It also would bring us to masses of tourists slopping their way around the mountain top with unrelenting teems of bees and flies. Admittedly, the view was gorgeous once we acknowledged the surrounding nuisances, but part of me wished we had earned it. The chair lift experience left us feeling meh and wanting for a bit more isolation. No harm done though, we'd make up for it with a trip to Cerro Tronador...

Margo blowing up mountain tops in the town center.

Oasis.

Shoes optional.

View going down of Lago Nahuel Huapi.

At the top.

So. Blue. 

Laguna Capri - El Chalten, Argentina

Part of me wants to die when Mark suggests we take the kids hiking. The whining. The dusty slowness. The whining. The non-stop coaxing session. The whining. Then there's dealing with the kids.  However the other part of me never fails to be impressed by his unfaltering confidence that we can easily accomplish these goals, and I guess we did travel all the way down here to hike a few mountains.

A gorgeous 2 hour drive from El Calafate on Highway 40, Argentina's Route 66, is a burgeoning town named El Chaltén, "The Smoking Mountain" and is an outdoorsy haven. In fact, Lonely Planet 2015 named it as a "city to know" in the world and with good reason: the mountains are super gorgeous with glaciers, waterfalls, and a mess of hikes for all abilities and motivations. The town is adorable with breweries, ice cream stores and artisanal shops. It's a mini El Calafate but with a much smaller flux of tourists. 

Mark had his sights set on a 4km hike to Laguna Capri, about two hours up. We started at 12:30 with plans to picnic at the lake before meeting our taxi by 5pm. The driver and trail volunteer both wished us luck with a dash of arrogance that we'd be unsuccessful in our time frame.  Unfazed, up we went. Sure, we had a few deep breath moments, but overall the hike was enjoyable with a few steep climbs and uncomfortably dusty walks through the meadows. Mark was 100% right. After calming Deets' fear that our picnic would roll in the sparkling cerulean lake, we sat down to enjoy the view. We even had enough time to share a bottle of wine and laugh at half-naked hikers try to bathe themselves while ruining everyone's photo ops.  Refreshed and full, back down we went, arriving at precisely 4:50pm. 

Our driver was gracious enough to drive us to a brewery for celebratory drinks and ice cream, and to the Rio de las Vueltas to soak our crusty feet. Tossing our clothes, boots and backpacks in the trunk we headed out. On the way we saw several herds of guanacos (red furred llamas) which completed our hopes for the day. We arrived to my favorite restaurant Viva la Pepa for another round of carrots, beer, and lentil stew at 8:30pm for another late dinner. He pulled right in front, humored onlookers watched us unload the trunk like a group of hitchhikers. To my surprise, the kids literally ran back up the hill to our B&B after dinner, before crashing into bed. It was a very good day. 

Views along the famous Highway 40

Laguna Capri- the guidebooks say 4 hours round trip,
I'm assuming they mean 4 hours
 for people using an ankle boot and neck brace.

Above Laguna Capri

Fitz Roy Peaks- where only well equipped
experts are allowed to climb it- people
who say funny things like "crampons."

Doesn't even do justice of the amount of dirt they collected.

Success!

Guanacos apparently are very camera shy.
Or perhaps scared of squealing children.

Sunset in El Calafate

I mentioned before our South B&B was adequate. While I wasn't a big fan of sleeping in taco folding bunk beds and having to beg housekeeping for clean towels, it was spacious and clean with responsive owners who were on site all day. I liked them- a brother and sister and their 5 or 6 curly haired dogs + occasionally appearing mother who parked herself in the restaurant every afternoon. I appreciated the pro-diversity acceptance badge of honor and their willingness to book us excursion reservations. Every morning we ate fresh baked white bread and coffee, and every evening Mark and I would scour their wifi to watch Brooklyn 99 on Netflix.  We even had a wide angle, spectacular view of Lago Argentino and town below every night. It was pleasant. Here are a few photos Mark took on a rare, windless sunset at 10:30pm. Was it worth our pricey single 5-sleeper room? I'll let you decide...

Laguna Nimez Ecological Reserve, El Calafate

In between epic trips to see glaciers and hike mountains, we countered with down time visiting playgrounds. Suddenly, foot dragging and energy loss from walking down the street (never mind hiking) would be replaced with hours of wind sprints and playground shenanigans. El Calafate was great for that- it has great, modern playgrounds with plenty of shade and choice of artillery: sticks/light sabers, sticks/guns, sticks/sonic screwdrivers.

We also took advantage of visiting a couple museums: El Centro de Interpretacion Historica Calafate, where tickets got us entry and a free yerba mate, plus a lesson on how to prepare and drink Argentina's favorite tea. The museum, though small, was packed with dinosaur bones and assorted fossils including a complete skeleton of everyone's favorite: the giant sloth. It also contained compelling stories of Aonikenk (Patagonian) Indians and the history that unfolded thereafter. We watched a video on glaciers before re-circling the museum for a 2nd and 3rd time listening Mark re-tell the stories of the dinosaurs for a 2nd and 3rd time.  Just to be thorough.

Deets was dying for more interactions with glaciers, so we hit up the Glaciarium, a luminous yet dark maze of sciency things about ice. Indeed, it was pretty cool. We could have paid the extra fee to enter the ice bar below but seeing as how I object to pretty much any bar with cover charges and wasn't feeling it for a 10:00am cocktail, we opted to play outside and attempt some family photos before the shuttle arrived. 

For sake of more outside play and education we visited the Laguna Nimez Ecological Reserve, home to more than 80 bird species. After paying the entry fee, it was only then that the employee informed me that between stations 8 and 9 it would be essential to remain silent so as not to spook the nesting falcons. Doing so could result in bird attacks. I don't care for birds. They kinda scare me with all their potential to peck and claw and attack- and here I was, willingly entering enemy territory with two time bombs. The falcons were very active: babies chirping like hell to get their breakfast and multiple sets of squawking parents were flying extremely low overhead. Perhaps the kids could sense my anxiety as I urged them to be absolutely quiet because they followed suit and we completed the circuit without major incident. For what it's worth, the Reserve really delivered. We saw a mess of different birds including ducks, geese, ibises, and flamingoes. To my pleasure, most of them were far away and totally uninterested. 

The kids fully in charge.

Laguna Nimez Nature Reserve

These guys weren't messing around.

Swooping in for its kill.

Black faced Ibis: Argentina's squirrel.
They were everywhere.

Yellow Billed Pintails.

Perito Moreno Glacier

Before our arrival to El Calafate, the only research I did was to secure a B&B for the week and vaguely remembered this was a hot spot for glacier viewing. So when we descended into the airport, I peered out the window to see an endless spread of 50 shades of tan. No trees, no grass- only dry shrubby terrain of plains and hills. We could easily have been in Wyoming. It was strikingly gorgeous. Then the airplane window offered a view of Lago Argentino: the biggest freshwater lake in Argentina born from glacier melt. It was the color of aquamarine and emerald jewels and the perfect HQ to Patagonian wilderness.

We loved the town immediately. It gave a laid back vibe of hippies and unfazed locals who didn't bat an eye with the hoards of inspired hikers arriving from all ends of the earth. After checking into our adequate South B&B we headed to dinner where I finally could gorge myself on carrot sticks. I know it's not a dream for everyone, but I'd been missing some vegetables in a major way. All week we ate salads, trout dishes, and lentil stews- for a price due to high season, but at least we knew it would be good.

With full bellies we moved onto planning our visit to see the famous Perito Moreno Glacier in the Parque Nacional Los Glaciares. A tour bus charged around 120 USD per person, a rental car would cost around 220 USD per day but you needed more than 24 hours notice. However a taxi driver/guide would cost around 175 USD for the day for all four of us. Needless to say we didn't think too hard on the math and booked ourselves a private guide. He didn't speak English and we didn't speak much Spanish, but we understood enough to appreciate the scenery he described and especially appreciated his knowledge of the roads.

It took about 45 minutes after driving into the park to get to our first glacier overlook and we were not to be disappointed. 250 square km of sky blue ice, the world's 3rd largest reserve of freshwater and we could hear the crowds literally crooning over its beauty. I myself would have cheered if it weren't for my dismal clothing choice. The weather in El Calafate, 48 miles away had been cloudless and windless. In the park, it was humidly cold and raining. My jeans and tennis shoes did nothing against the biting wind. The kids were appropriately dressed but of course Margo picked up my distress and decided she was much too cold as well. She opted to harass the guide in the warm car while we ran around the overlooks like yetis, taking pictures of the looming fog. We drove down to the shore where you can pay for an hour long boat trip for a closer look from below... we waited in line to board, pretending the rain didn't matter. While I enjoyed this boat trip in general, I was not impressed with the pushy, elbowing crowd jockeying for their spots to take prime photos- particularly when my kids' safety is involved. I kept calm but that was probably because my hands were frozen stiff. 

Floating from one edge of the lake to the other, we saw giant pieces of ice break off and crash into the water and we enviously watched day-trekkers explore the glacier. (This had been a trip in consideration for at least Mark and Deets but they have an age restriction: no kids younger than 10 and NO exceptions.) After 50 minutes of molecular drifting, it was time to return for the next batch of tourists. Piling back into the taxi, I thought our day was completed. But apparently the park saves the best for last: the catwalk. About 1.6km long, the catwalk/maze has thousands of steps ascending and descending the adjacent mountain for unobstructed views of Perito Moreno, both the north and south side. 

I'm not going to lie. It continued to be windy as hell and downright miserable. I nearly gave up in defeat after our first descent, but realizing this trip was once in a lifetime, continued on. Well the gods must have been happy because at all once the wind stopped and the clouds scattered. No more forced appreciation!  I was no longer cold and I could actually enjoy myself. Margo agreed with me despite slipping on the metal grates, cracking her knees a few times but we covered the entire catwalk and returned to the top just in time for the rain to fall again. Soaked and exhausted, we piled into the taxi for an uneventful ride home...

El Calafate from the airplane.

Lago Argentino, El Calafate

First glimpse of Perito Merino.

The Royal Freezing Princess Margo on the boat.

Red, white, and blue.

Stupid smug glacier trekkers.

The Motherfu*@ing Catwalk!

Owning the stairs.

Mossy only growing on the glacier exposed side.

Perito Moreno: north side.

South side.

 Ghoulish Glacier Dragon-Monster.

Penguins in Ushuaia

I felt a little sting to the wallet as I handed over a pile of cash to the Pira Tour representative to solidify 4 spots for the famous Walk with Penguins tour. After all, we'd just seen hundreds of penguins the other day when we took our 2nd boat tour of the Beagle Channel. How would this excursion be any different other than smelly? I surmised. 

Turns out- it was totally different. It blew my mind and I regret nothing. 

Mark and I bundled up the kids and headed to the docks for an early bus pick up. Only it wasn't a bus- it was more like a multi-passenger monster truck with tires taller than my kids. For the next two hours we cruised along the rocky National Route #3 to our first destination. Our guide was a young and enthusiastic man who was nearly done with his tourism and hospitality degree at university. Completely oblivious to car sickness Niko stood backwards in the truck, telling us how Canadian beavers were introduced to Ushuaia nearly devastating the forests a 100 years ago and eventually swimming the Beagle Channel to invade Chile. Or how the jagged mountain peaks indicated they were taller than 1,000 meters because they were higher than a prehistoric glacier that once covered the area. The local knowledge rolled off his tongue and before we knew it, we had arrived to Estancia Haberton, a historic and gorgeous cattle ranch where we would prepare for the next leg of travel. 

In order to get to the penguin rookery on Martillo Island, we were treated with an very exciting ocean romp on a Zodiac. If it weren't for an obscene number of penguins milling about the shore, I doubt my kids would have gotten off the boat, they loved it so much. After multiple pep talks warnings to keep a 3 meter distance from the birds, and to remain extremely quiet we were led onto the shore only to have overexcited selfie takers and oblivious rule breakers freak out with the first batch of penguins. (I will smugly point out that the Schlinks abided.) Niko calmly regathered us, and eventually the Magellanic penguins and a few King penguins sidled back to their spots. We also got to see a small patch of Gentoo penguins in their nests- though to be the only ones living on continental South America. Normally they reside in Antarctica. 

Moving along as a cohort we got to see their nests: hundreds of 12-18" burrows dotted the landscape, each with a parent penguin nestled with one or two babies. Margo was elated by this adorability factor, which in turn elated me. On the water, penguins torpedoed through the waves, while others sunned themselves on the pebbly beach. Before we knew it, our time was up and we needed to return to the farm for rhubarb crisp and hot chocolate.

Our next hour was spent touring the Acatushún Museum, dedicated to studying birds and marine life of South America. Interestingly, the skeleton collection started with washed up animals found by Natalie Goodall, a biologist from Ohio who had travelled and worked extensively through Venezuela and the Caribbean before setting roots at Estancia Haberton. Here she raised a family and continued studying local flora and fauna, publishing scientific articles well into her 70s. Deets was overwhelmed with the gorgeous skeletons and baleen fronds. His enthusiasm inspired an intern to give him a tour of the lab, where no other visitors were allowed. Reluctantly, it was time to board the lime green truck-bus and head back to Ushuaia. Of course Margo and Deets passed out, heads in our laps after 10 minutes, despite the rough drive. How kids can do that, I'll never know. 

Our ride for the day.

Sweet baby love. Magellanic penguins.

On board the Zodiac.

Checking out our ride.

Taking a stretch.

The watch. 

The King of them all.

The Eugene Levy of penguins: Gentoo

Penguin groupies.

Mutual love of whale bones.

Ushuaia Boat Trip

Of the many "can't miss" excursions in Ushuaia, a boat tour of the Beagle Channel is among them. We chose Rumba Sur, a company based on a few necessities: a bigger boat for potential seasickness, and heated indoor seating with coffee and hot chocolate service for cold noses. That, and the timing since we already dragged our kids down to the dock. We were presented with two options: a short 2.5 hour, or a 5 hour tour. The big difference being the longer tour extended further out to Penguin Island where you can watch penguins from the boat. By the end of the week we ended up doing both tours, though if pressed for time and choice, I would recommend doing the short tour followed by a tour where you actually walk with penguins (more on that soon.) 

The kids were ecstatic and entertained, insisting they stay outside despite the cold wind and splashing water for most of the trip. I had been worried about their relative warmth considering how wimpy I have become, but they didn't even notice. They are masochistic cold-loving monsters.

Ready for the boat.

Fingers crossed we don't need this.

Leaving Ushuaia behind.

Impressed and intimidated by their thick neon orange one-pieces.

Literally named: Bird Island.

Isla de los Lobos

Group huddle.

Hanging out.

Faro Les Eclaireurs

Magellanic penguin.